My friend irina
She smiles
She’s ok
She encourages
She dreams
She is always there for me
She gives a hug im all ok
She says she’s fine,they’ll believe the lie
But i see behind that fake smile
That fake “im fine” that she usually says
From a mile i can see her tears imprinted on her face
From a mile i can see the scars on her tired forearms
She says she’s fine
But she hurts herself,with words and blades
With pills and fake affirmations about herself
I try to help,i try to smile,just for her
Not anybody else
I see her puffy eyes when everyone just says good bye
I stay by her side all the time,hopping she will open up
But im just there
A burden on her back
She says she doesn’t mind that
But she has a lot on her beautiful mind
My friend irina
She cries
She screams
She cuts
She dreams
I wasn’t there when she tried to take her life
But i was there when her heart broke into millions of pieces
I gathered them all in one
Replaced it with all i had
Hopping she ‘ll go back
To being fine and all that
My friend irina
Everyone just sees a girl
With eyes and lips and thighs
I see a strong women fighting for her life
With tired brown eyes,like the hot chocolate on a chilly night
With her curly hair like the waves of the ocean on a breezy night
With her broken smile that she gives me when im not alright
With the clothes she wears to cover up her past
A girl like her you’ll never find
She’s unique and kind
Broken at the same time
Trying to glue her back
Im losing her just like that
Everyone just says she’s fine
But i see behind all that
They found out about her past
The scars on her arms
That’s all they see
Her past
Her “mistakes”
She overthinks over stupid airheads
About everything she has
She changed
She changed a lot
Into good into bad
People don’t care
They don’t see her for who she is but only for her mistakes
They judge
They laugh
They make “funny” jokes about all that
They say things they should not
I try to erase everything they said
But its set in her mind
The words are making her go mad
I try to change her mind
Before she takes what she has
I try to stay calm,when im freaking out
I try to say its fine when she freaks out
I say it will be alright
But all she does is say “im fine”
You’re not
You’re sad,and mad
Happy and glad
You tend to be there for everyone when you’re falling apart
My friend irina
She says she’s fine
She says she won’t do it again
She makes promises to herself the others might brake
She stays true to her mind but lies to her heart
Im here for her but she is not here with me
Im here for her but she disappears
She takes refuge in her mind
Thinking its safer that real life
Im trying to wake her up
Im trying to make her stay
Im stealing her bad thoughts away
Hoping it will make a change
But they multiply by the day
Making her want to go away
What should i do
Say goodbye or fight for her life
I tend to smile all the time
When people are around
So they thing she is better now
But when there’s only the two of us
The bridges fall down
She tells me her worries but not fully
She tells me i didn’t do anything but the truth is ,it’s all my fault
Hopefully she will be fine
She will win this battle with her mind
I’ll be the shoulder that she can cry on but also the soldier fighting for her life
I’ll be there
With my whole mind
I’ll be right there behind
Always ready to fight back
Im here
I’ll always be here
My friend irina
She smiles but if i don’t do anything i will lose her like she lost her mind,i won’t let that happen ,i will be on watch all the time
Don’t worry
We’ll fight together
For the rest of my life
That’s my friend Irina
She is truly the best
That’s why
She has to stay